A woman can lead a company, manage money, make decisions and still experience herself as feminine.
There is no contradiction unless femininity has been defined as the absence of agency.
The more useful question is why some women say they are tired of "being in charge" inside the relationship.
That experience deserves translation.
Work competence does not decide relationship preference
A person can enjoy leadership at work and prefer more initiative from a partner at home.
Another woman may enjoy leading in both places.
Neither preference proves anything universal about women.
People often want different roles in different settings.
The mistake is turning one preference into an identity rule.